A Motivated teacher motivates students, or is it the other way around?

 

I  am usually  a very motivated person, always ready for adventure, so it is very interesting that I have chosen this special moment in my life to write about it, when I find myself going through a low period. At the beginning I felt it was  tragic and  disastrous.   Now I know that eventually I will surely come to understand that this actually is the best time to reflect about motivation, and the lack of it.

To start with, I have realized that the personal life of a teacher is more important than I’ve ever thought. Second, I have learned through experience that teaching and life in the classroom is a cooperative moment in which everyone brings something to help the others bloom.  

I was very lucky this year to have a special bunch of  year 4 students, and I like to believe  despite the ups and downs, they did  motivate me during difficult moments as I did for them as the year unfolded itself. I didn’t need to share my problems or express my moods when I was with them. Students  responded  from within the atmosphere I built for them ; they reacted in a similar way to what they were surrounded by. They didn’t have to tell me “I had a bad day”. I knew.

In the same way, they also knew when I was having a rough time, the feeling of walking  empty-handed into the classroom – no ideas, no enthusiasm,, and seeing no way out of this situation. Yet, I always came to my students with love, understanding and trust. I trusted ( and still do)  in their power to motivate me.  They approached, shared more about themselves and told me what a good teacher I was and how much they loved me and enjoyed my classes.

Did I build that in them? Yes, I’d like to believe that I did.

Now  after 26 years of teaching activity and due to  a series of unfortunate events in my life, I am on leave. to treat myself. I try to concentrate on what is here and now. I do what I have advised my close ones so many times. For the first time in a looooong time, I am reading  books not at all related to teaching. I notice and enjoy the world around me , the everyday simple pleasures– the sky, my pets, sipping a cup of tea in a cozy corner while reading an enlightening story, or watching the birds that are starting to appear more often in my garden as the spring approaches here in Patagonia.I do all of that because I think that whatever it is that took my motivation away will vanish sooner or later. Until then, there is no use spending too much energy, time and thought on worrying over it, making my anguish take control.  It’s time to recharge, time to walk off the worn paths that lead nowhere anymore, time to re-evaluate my priorities again.

Perhaps the most painful lesson I am learning is that  we  cannot give our children what we don’t have. Where we are on our journey of living and loving with our whole hearts is a much stronger indicator of teaching success than anything we can learn at university.

So I stepped out of that way a bit, hoping no one would notice and at the same time hoping for a spark, Yes we all struggle with shame and fear of not being enough.And, yes, many of us are afraid to let our true selves be seen and known.  I reached out and revealed what I was going through to my family first; they supported me with their loving compassion and understanding, then I told my boss , and through her,  my colleagues found out too. I got a tight hug from  the owner of the school I work at, and a “don’t worry Lara. The important thing now is that you feel whole again”, wholeheartedly said by my boss. Is this how we motivate ourselves?

I’m learning to believe that it is.

Lara

PS Here is the link to watch an excellent talk called MOTIVATING THE UNMOTIVATED by Jeremy Harmer